Archives February 2018

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Company Owners facing a debt-crisis – “I WILL NEVER STOP, BECAUSE MEN SAY NO…”

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The lesson of debt is not dumping your debt on someone’s desk and transposing the entire responsibility onto their plate with your futile excuses, mostly pleading poverty, then later it is found you went on vacation, whilst someone else is trying to protect your life, believing your lies and incorrectly defending you with your creditors?

Who does this? How is possible that you are oblivious to the facts that:

a. It is unacceptable to dump your debt onto someone else’s desk and walk into the sunshine with no sense of responsibility;

b. It is also obnoxious to assume that the company or individual has no choice but to accept this attitude, because you signed an agreement on the dotted line and now you call the shots?

c. It’s also totally unacceptable for the company to protect you against your creditors during the process of remedial submission, whilst you plead poverty by convincing ways that you cannot afford to contribute towards your overdues, but then you are keeping the money for your vacation?

d. Where is your conscience? You cannot recover without one.

e. How come someone else who never spent the money you borrowed, must unintentionally lie to your creditors, because you are underhanded?

f. How come once the remedial tasks are completed, you now feel the need to dissect their service fees because you believe most is undeserved, even if the outcome is positive? Based on what level of mentality are you biting the hand the feeds you?

g. Initially when you are seated in front of a remedial officer, pleading, begging and crying for mercy and help with bad intentions, my advice is enroll yourself in Hollywood, as they are direly seeking actors like yourself.

h. Existing with no self-respect, integrity or respect for those whom you reach out to for help, who take the time and make the effort to tender this help, is a shameless act, where it is deserving for you to rather face your wrath, so you will be forced pay dues to learn respect.

i. When you openly devalue the value of any individual, company or creditor who takes your hand to save your life, then it comes around, in its own time, not yours and when you least expect it, but come around it will, as true as the sun rises and sets daily.

Authentic humanitarian gratitude and appreciation are the only forms of reciprocation that fosters progress, recovery and abundance we all dream of, without that, we are almost soulless and empty humans. Nothing replaces being thankful for someone for being there for you, respecting their efforts and unwavering support to help you. Acting without any remorse and ungratefulness is not the attitude to take, as it will negatively ricochet back into your life.

Many debtors who faced a debt-crisis and acted out this way, are clueless about how much they have compromised their own image and integrity, which affects the character you presented, where the country is huge but also small, because there is literally nowhere to hide.

This attitude can be compared to the mentality of such debtors who assume that when they were in dire debt, unable to pay their EMI’s, they just applied for another loan or credit card, which filled a hole, saved them for a month or more, but left another hole, which is why they faced a debt-crisis.

In the same way if you assume that right now you could cheat your way through asking for help, not paying for the service and the job is done? You are sadly mistaken, as dues you will pay and more than what is owing, because it’s the circle of life.

There has always been dishonest under-handed debtors, but it appears the trend has increased substantially, more so the very good actors, of specific nationalities, who have opted for this route and my message to you today is carry on, see how far it will get you, but one fine day, when you find yourself in a place where your hands are tied, no more under-handed activities, then don’t ask why, know why and think of the acts of dishonesty intentionally performed by you.

At the end, these acts of dishonesty affect the lives of other bread winners, who were either terminated from their jobs, because they reached out and took your hand to help you, or someone who never received their salary like you did, because you never paid your dues. So, when you negatively touch a life, a life touches you in the same way, there is no escape.

Like I said, it’s a circle, it will always be a circle, so any negative cog affects the circle somewhere along the line and it is a sad day that such debtors have no conscience, but we are hoping for less users and more honest sincerity, because the circle of evolution must continue, the bad apples always ever drop off along the way.

I’ve been speaking about this for years, trying to encourage debtors facing a debt-crisis, or those who know they will soon, to stop hovering in the background, faceless, because you are ashamed or embarrassed. The truth is every day that you procrastinate, is a day that you put the progress of your life on hold and you allow your debt problems to snowball, later into an uncontrollable situation.

You know you have a critical debt problem, you have known for some time now, but you’ve either wasted so much time to delay reaching out to your creditors or remedial companies that can fully support you, or you are simply existing in a delusional zone, pushing this story so far back out of your mind and reality, too busy draining energy from yourself. It takes energy to continue being pretentious, like there is nothing wrong, hard work to put up a good façade all day, only to crumble into a sad pile when you can lift that façade, be that when you get home at night, or spasms during the day, when you are alone.  Know that the people who matter in your life, your loved one’s they can feel the pressure, tension and negative emotions hence you are also affecting their life! So, as much as you assume they don’t know, or you are hiding it from them, they know something is horribly wrong, if they don’t know the actual situation.

Therefore, it is your duty to convene a family meeting and open to the real situation, because you will need this support and most times you will be surprised that the needed support will be given, you only had to ask. This lifts a huge burden off your head, so you can gain clarity, focus and take the first step to your debt recovery, without having additional fear that they will find out, or anyone will find out, you owe it to yourself, nobody else.

I am here to tell you that all is not lost, hope exists if you believe it, or you can come to terms with the fact that it is never too late to step forward and reach out for the hands that understand and is willing to help you activate a debt recovery plan, to ensure you are on the road to debt recovery.

It’s simple, put everything aside and think of yourself, your own well-being, existence, progress in life, the fact that you want to be in a place of recovery, start to feel better about yourself and be able to be proud of your achievements and live your authentic self.

It’s hard work to continue putting up a façade with others, like there is no problem, like all is fine when it’s not, because that zone has an expiry date and if you are fortunate enough to cut the cords before the situation worsens, then you’ve won your own day. This debt problem has an uncanny way of creeping into your entire life and saturating it, until there is no way to turn and you don’t want to be there, because it’s an unpleasant place to cope with and it can destroy you.

Very important is that it’s not going to be easy to get back on track, but there are no choices, once you take the first step then there are huge sacrifices to be made, perseverance, keeping your commitment to your creditors and reducing your personal expenses, scaling down all-round, no shopping for items you don’t need, no vacations (yes, I mean it!), no extra luxuries and this can continue for a good many years, but at the end, the journey would have been worth it!

Remember, you did not accumulate this debt in one or six months, so don’t expect instantaneous miracles of recovery, because it is a path where you are tested, you may crack many times, but you must learn to pick yourself up and push forward, nothing lost, nothing gained! It’s 100% times better than facing legal action, because then you have minimal options if you’ve left it too late.

It’s not easy to come out of the woodwork and admit to anyone that you are facing a debt-crisis, but the problem is, if you don’t act, the debt will do it for you and then the situation is worse, where you will have no choice and face harsher actions.

Don’t look back, keep looking forward, forget about the possibility of being blacklisted, you are not here to seek more credit, but a remedial solution to your debt-crisis problems, so more credit is never going to be an option, else, you will never recover. Debt is a serious addiction, because in the past credit was readily available where people never had any constraints, but it’s caught up with them in a serious way, because they were out of control.

The story of ‘what happened to the money?’ is a fruitless exercise, because nobody will admit that they have it stashed away somewhere else if this is their situation, the fact is, the problem is here, so it must be faced in the most honest way. Being dishonest has a bigger price tag attached to it somewhere in the distant future, when you least expect it and when you can least afford it, because that’s the lesson of life, dues must be paid and it’s not up to you, me or anyone else.

Hovering in the background with no clarity and loads of procrastination is an historic trait of debtors, because they never want to reveal themselves for the negative stigmas attached to debtors facing a debt-crisis. Those days are gone, we must evolve to survive, thrive and be the very best that we can be, where facing a debt-crisis is a hurdle that you can overcome, with enough determination, willpower and inner strength, call it faith, or your beliefs, but it’s what you will need on this journey.

My invitation to those of you facing this debt-crisis problem, step out, take ownership and responsibility, lift the burden off your shoulders and if there are fees to be paid, then stop complaining and trying to haggle prices, because professional services with excellent deliverables can appear to be intangible, until the performance is tangible. If this is the case, then you need to think about what your life is worth, and I am sure it’s worth much more than what money can buy.

When anyone reaches out to take your hand to help you in your debt-crisis then remember, they are taking a huge risk, because with your default record, they have no guarantee of your future commitment and as the record stands, many have been dishonest and leveraged on a remedial mechanism to ease their debt burden, only to disappear into thin air!

Be credible, learn to rebuild your integrity and remember, the money you spent, was given to you in good faith by your creditors, so you need to reciprocate in the same vein, as they don’t owe you any favours to apply ridiculous discounts, only to protect their assets, because their livelihood depends on this very important factor too!

Personally, I have entered this 2018 New Year with so much hope that those Debtors who are still procrastinating and surviving on excuses that they have beaten to death, will finally have the courage to take ownership and responsibility for the debt-crisis they have been facing for many months or a few years.

Now is the time to take that critical action to save yourself, your family and life and possibly a business that needs dire recovery, because sooner than later even if you have been holding the fort, ducking and diving from creditors, the bottom will fall out and then damage control is way beyond your capabilities, because procrastination is the thief of time. It eliminates the time you had to save yourself when you had the chance to, but from my experience, many debtors have wasted invaluable time asking and taking advice from the wrong people and this is the reason they are now in a dire situation.

My philosophy is that most of the time, we save ourselves with the help of our maker or maybe some really kind soul who feels the need to support us. But the latter situation is rare, because especially today, people have their own set of problems, they too are fighting to survive or thrive and have a goal that they are focused on, where it is their right to take care of themselves first, then the others.

So, my advice today on this brand new 2nd New Year’s Day is:

a. Save yourself now, not tomorrow, or next month;

b. Forget promises of an investor where you assume you can utilize some of those funds to repay or settle your debt, because no investor will risk their funds when the foundation is saturated in liabilities which are way overdue, pending legal action, because most of the time, you must be realistic, where I know that it’s very easy to be delusional with this desperate debt mindset;

c. Don’t take advice from anyone who’s trying to convince you that there’s a shortcut, because I’m here to tell you there is none, it’s the long hard road of debt recovery, for which you should be aptly prepared;

d. Forget the holiday, you can’t afford it, put your money where it’s needed right now, or face the consequences, as sacrifices dictates they must be made, or pay the price;

e. Turn a new leaf, decide to face your creditors or seek the help from a reputable remedial company to assist you, but do the right thing, for you;

f. Prepare your documents needed so you are ready and list all your liabilities in detail, so the picture is clear to everyone involved, including yourself;

g. Where you have done wrong and you have the money to pay your creditor, then do the right thing and pay your overdues, because it will support you for future problems. When you live with no gratitude, life will become hard and painful for you and then you should not wonder why, because that too, dictates you pay dues.

Peace of mind instills well-being and if you want to enjoy this peace then you need to do the work first, because nothing just happens, you must make it happen, so action is the order of the day.

Creditors, let me ask that you try and support willing debtors to the best of your ability, as there is no need to impose more harshness upon them, when they have stepped forward, taken ownership and responsibility and shown the humility to repay their debt in asking for your help.

There is absolutely no reason to resort to legal action if the debtor is in earlier months of default where this seems to be a new trend surfacing, because you have no need to go this route when you are in a position of strength to help the debtor, if the due diligence applied qualifies him for this help. The decision is simple logic, but many operate on personal egos to prove a point, remember I have always said that this too has a price, because when you can, then you must, even if you have a personal grudge for your own unjustified reasons.

You should comprehend that in today’s world, authentically serving humanity has huge rewards and you don’t have to do these deeds for rewards, you just must do it from your heart, because you want to, and it is the right thing to do.

We are all connected and so why some think they are entitled or superior is beyond me, but my request today is for all to co-operate to ensure seamless engagements and a successful outcome for all, because we need to survive and thrive, where some have made mistakes, but that does not justify generalization to impose legal action on them, because not all are cut from the same cloth, many are genuinely facing a debt-crisis and are sincere with their intentions, so this needs to be respected.

It’s a new year, new days, weeks and months ahead of us and together we can make the most of it, where we all can benefit! No one person is an island because it’s just not possible to operate with this mindset.

A visible trend expanding rapidly is debtors spending a huge amount of time trying to secure investors for their ailing businesses, including intentions of servicing their debt delinquency, in some instances, repaying the total liabilities with banks and suppliers.

This may not be a bad strategy, but only if your business has promising prospects, is fully established for a no of years with a sound reputation despite current hardships and you are positive that you can service your investor’s Return On Investment (ROI).

When you are in debt then there are no short cuts, not even to use someone else’s hard-earned money for your own personal gain, with absolute intentions to fully utilize the investment funds to service your debt. Unless you can secure approval for a buy-out or a loan to settle your debts, banks do not approve loans to repay debt otherwise, so the same principle should apply for your own debt.

When you are in debt, then shortcuts almost never exist, because there is a lesson to be learnt, sacrifices to be made and commitments to be kept, as the flipside of this coin is regaining your self-respect, self-confidence, credibility, integrity and reputation. These cannot be bought in any store, it takes hard work and consistency to finally be debt-free, with your own money, not someone else’s.

In most instances. it took you a long time to accumulate your debt, so how come you demand a solution in a week, month or a few months? It requires patience and perseverance to achieve your objectives that will set you on your path to financial freedom.

In ‘the day, when most businesses were booming, and an investor wanted to opt in to secure a piece of the pie’ then you would probably have been reluctant because you didn’t need the money, or you would have no hesitation to approve such investors with a clear conscience.

These days you are wasting time faffing around meeting multiple investors to secure their approval, when you know that your credit rating and credibility are an open book, that they can be obtained at a drop of a coin when requested, because that is a document you will have no option but to present.

If you avoid presenting the whole truth and nothing but the truth, understand a key factor that as much as you assume you are a master manipulator, successful investors and business individuals have it mastered down to a fine art, which is why they are successful, as they know how to apply their due diligence and seek out the truth.

My concern is that on the flip side, your delinquency is accumulating and spiraling out of control, whilst you spend invaluable time you could have used to meet with your creditors to resolve your debt-crisis, which is probably in a dire state, bordering on legal action.

The problem is many debtors choose selective memory or consciousness when they have convinced themselves that the investor option is the best shortcut they can secure. In fact, once the investor declines the opportunity, your situation is probably 4 or 5 times worse, because an experienced investor would have facilitated a professional audit, by which time when they find that the companies liabilities are in a dire situation, that door will close and then facing your creditors will be an extremely difficult task.

You need to take responsibility now to put out the burning fires, not just ignore them and once the investor declines, you want to take a demanding attitude towards your creditor for a 50% discount and restructure, simply because you lost control and when your creditor declines, resort to a bad attitude?

Wrong, experience has always taught me that when you have money, then you don’t need any money offers, but when you need money, there will be no offers, because normally it’s the long hard road that only you must take, nobody else, because it’s the lesson ordained for you to learn from and never repeat again.

Sometimes investor injections can fully support a business where there is a temporary cash flow problem, but sound secured contracts or agreements existing for long tenures with excellent pay masters.

Then it makes perfect sense, including current long-term prospects that are pending for closure with absolute surety, however the latter is almost never guaranteed, because in business you cannot summarize or speculate aimlessly, hoping you would strike those irons, as the tables can turn in minute. It only takes one competitor to outprice you or add extra value that best suits the client, which is something you could have missed.

None of us are infallible, especially in business, so vigilant is the key factor on all fronts and that includes ‘taking care of your cheese’.

As business owners who have failed and you try to make the wrongs right in the incorrect way, you almost always resort to selective hearing when sound advice is tendered, until the bottom falls out, then you resort to amateur dramatics, pity parties and emotional angry aggressive outbursts, which actually worsens your state of mind and situation.

Creditors, if a debtor has approached you for remedial support, why are your collections representatives suddenly resorting to presenting cheques and then filing legal cases? In some instances, the request is completely ignored, the debtor pushed from one representative to another long before the next EMI is due, then demands are made or legal action advised.

A few days ago, a customer wanted to settle their credit card balance which was average, yet the finance establishment, not a bank, refused any 1fil discount, when their interest rate is way above the normal level for a card. They refused to negotiate, it’s their way or the highway! So, what’s the projected outcome? I would say from my experience, legal, then how can this be fair?

I understand the demanding debtor who is not only arrogant, but acts entitled when they have depleted all the credit and more, this example does not pertain to the debtor we are portraying. If a debtor’s DBR is 100% and they are settling 1 medium credit card, with 2 very low remaining credit cards to be rescheduled, reducing their DBR to way below 50% and they have cash in hand to settle in a 1shot reasonable settlement nowhere near 30%, then why refuse them? Why opt to offer a restructure on a AED 18,000 credit card balance because if they do, the outcome will be repaying this debt 3 times over! How logical is that?

Currently there tends to be some huge illogical unjustified reasons when it pertains to remedial or settlement requests, unlike before, where:

1. Creditors are assuming that customers approach a remedial company, so they can stop paying their EMI’s and finally secure a restructure – Wrong! The customer has had their own foresight that in the following 1-2months they would be facing a problem and be unable to meet their EMI’s, due to their cash-flow problems. So, the creditor stalls their response by months, placing the customer in delinquency, because after all, they did say that they would be facing a problem meeting future EMI’s, but can afford 50%, which is what we requested. What have I been advising debtors for years? i.e. ‘Approach your creditor or a remedial company long before you will face problems…” and it has taken many years for them to realize that this is the only logical action to take when the situation appears grim around the corner.

Clearly all creditors and/or bank’s have their own policies, which cannot be dictated, but unique debtor circumstances can justify a special review to try and accommodate a remedial request, taking the debtor’s entire financial exposure into consideration, which is what remedial companies undertake, as neither the creditor or bank/creditor has the ability or takes the responsibility to ‘buy-out’ the debtor’s liabilities, especially where the salary is credited to the account monthly. In many cases it is impossible to perform and approve the latter, where the total liabilities are excessive, but then a creditor cannot simply deduce incorrect assumptions, simply because they feel they are qualified to do so, when they have not seen the entire picture.

2. Remedial requests are prolonged for as long as 6months or more, where none of the creditor representatives take responsibility for the case, even after convincing the debtor that they must pay 1 EMI and then the case will be submitted for restructure review, or deferment review, where once the EMI is paid, the case is allocated to the next collector, where there is absolutely no handover, so no continuity and finally, the customer is faced with more penalties, demands for all immediate overdues, or legal action. Since when does a creditor not realize that reducing debtor income will result in job losses, to which they are not immune?

You do not get to push people around like balls when they are pleading for your help, where you are in a position of strength to tender such assistance, but you simply show a blind eye, because your only objective is to secure your target.

I agree that many debtors do not deserve the attention, because they are either under-handed or have hidden agendas not to fulfil their obligations, however that phase is slowly dying a death, where people are now coming forward for the help, as many still have existing businesses that is operational, although the income has reduced, some still have jobs and again they have a reduced income.

But despite presenting all supporting documentation, in many instances the creditors continue requesting additional documentation, the case gets lost in the mist, nobody knows the outcome and finally one manager will call the customer in to discuss the case only to inform them that “We cannot approve your restructure, what you need is a cash injection!”

Seriously, as if a business owner has no clue that a cash injection would resolve their problems tomorrow morning? How is it possible that these individuals appointed as managers at organizations have such bad client service skills and business experience that they have no clue about the solution they are presenting to their customer, when it is irrelevant and not the reason that the customer assumed they were requested to meet after 4months of waiting for a remedial solution to be approved?

Let us not regress, because if we do, it affects the full cycle, that means all of us, because it is imperative that we take hands and try to support everyone, as the spin-off is immeasurable. In situations like these we are supposed to be one, not one party who operates under the auspices of ‘entitlement’ and another perceived as ‘beggars’, where the latter applies to both the debtor and the remedial companies.

The customer walked through our door, not yours for a reason, which is normally that they have already walked through your door multiple times receiving no assistance or support, their requests and pleas disappeared on deaf ears jus because, no specific reason, a factor many debtors have had to accept and learn to live with, until someone referred them to a remedial company who fully supports debtors.

So, why throw the stones at the remedial company, why not accept your faults and try corrective measures and damage control to protect your organization’s assets? Because it’s easy to point fingers and blame others, simply.

The world has evolved, yet some of you are oblivious and still exist in your own cocoon, you do what suits you and act unaffected by the hardship you inflict on debtors when they are pleading for your help and you turn a blind eye, when you can help. It’s about extending kindness and supporting where you can and as an entrepreneur, I understand more than you do about business, so I don’t expect you to transform your organization into a charity, but you can do better.

Today the trend within the workplace is different, the HR should now be the hub of all employee productivity and performance deterrents and have identified that debt is the largest factor.

EFFRS, Dubai are offering a Helping Hand, to directly address this problem and avoid unpleasantness interactions, fruitless HR approaches where the employees situation is not improving and then to extend a reach to them to secure a solution for the debt-crisis many are facing.

Over the past 2 years many employees have been terminated because debt reached the HR’s door and it doesn’t matter how much the employee has tried for an amicable solution with their creditor, sometimes they are unable to resolve the problem by themselves.

There are thousands of you still lurking in the shadows, fighting your debt-crisis silently, hoping for a miracle, because I know you have tried all ways with no positive outcome, but today is where I redirect your focus, on how you arrived at this crisis and how to transform your life. The steps I am sharing will form the sound foundation you need to emotionally prepare yourself, to face your debt-crisis. There is absolutely no way when you are engulfed in emotional fear, with zero clarity or focus, including being insecure and unstable, that you can make informed decisions to act.

This advice is not ‘a pie in the sky’, or a ‘delusion of grandeur’, but the true facts, which are, creation of realities, i.e. you are responsible for your situation, because simply, you created it!

a. “How did I get into this situation so fast, without even noticing?

b. How did my business just spiral, why was I not focusing and wasting time and not noticing that I had not set an intention to achieve anything, I was just spending money unconsciously, probably assuming there was a ‘bottomless pit’?

c. Why did I not see any ‘red flags’?

d. Why can I not account for most of this expenditure in detail?

Because, when money flows, we lose our mind, we never stop to ‘maintain records, or even think about a rainy day and as fast as that money flows into your life, if you don’t respect it, you will lose it and it doesn’t matter if it’s thousands, hundreds of thousands or millions.

I know this, because it happened to me, except, I was spending my own millions, not someone else’s, but I also never focused on the fact that my money flow was not a bottomless pit, I was too concerned to meet the needs of Tom, Dick and Harry, until my flow was depleted, where the shock was, they were all nowhere to be found once my pit was dry!

We are human, we make mistakes, so beating yourselves up about it, will ensure you continue to regress, the doors will continue to remain close, nothing will move and the tunnel will seem long and dark with no hope, because that is what you are creating, just like you created your debt, or lost your money – Blame yourself, take responsibility and once you have clarity, set your intention and take the much needed action to save yourself and your life.

Many will say talking is easy, yes, it is, but put action into your words and thoughts and keep them positive, because you need to do nothing else but change your thoughts to change your world. Nothing remains dark forever, so unless you make that move to step out and take action, nothing will change, you will simply revolve around in circles, with no progress, worsening your situation.

When you don’t have a plan, you are lost, because then it means you have no direction, therefore no forthcoming solution and it’s a sad day when just around the corner, you could have saved yourself.

When you are down and out, learn to saturate yourself with books pertaining to achieving wealth, abundance, prosperity and new success in your life, forget about beating the old drums of how you got to your debt-crisis, because it’s gone, you must learn to move forward and put the old behind you.

I never stop emerging myself in improving my own knowledge and experience and just this weekend I picked up my favourite “Think And Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill and it’s a book you should keep pushing yourself daily, because if you master the teachings in that book, you will master achieving tremendous wealth and transforming your life. So instead of prancing to the mall and spending money you don’t have on goods you don’t need, invest in this book, because it is a lifetime investment.

Let me share some significant points with you. There are six ways to turn desire into Gold, so follow those steps daily, no matter how depressed, suppressed and repressed you feel. Some powerful affirmations he shares in this book, that should resonate with those of you who live with huge hope, who know that you can transform your life, but maybe you don’t know how, so here they are:

“Every person who wins in any undertaking, must be willing to burn he’s ships and cut all sources of retreat…”

“You may as well know, right here, that you can never have riches in great quantities, unless you can work yourself into white heat of desire for money, and actually believe you will possess it…”

“When you begin to think and grow rich, you will observe that riches begin with a state of mind, with definiteness of purpose, with little or no hard work…”

“Before success comes in any man’s life, he is sure to meet with much temporary defeat…”

“I will never stop, because men say no…”

So, really, things are thoughts and powerful things at that, when they are mixed with a definiteness of purpose, persistence and a burning desire for their translation into riches. Which means that it doesn’t matter where you are right now with your debt-crisis, you can change your situation by changing your thoughts and the help you need will flow to you. This is not a fallacy, it is how the universe revolves for us humans who can connect at that level and somehow many of you remain clouded. I speak to many daily, but they are bent on rattling off their old story and beating their old drums, when they don’t realize, if they just stopped for 5minutes and listened to themselves, and remembered how many people they rattled that same story to, how may people stopped taking their calls or responding to their pleas for help, because most people will listen to your story, but they can’t get involved as they have their own lives and responsibilities.

The job is yours and only yours and nobody can do it for you and I am here to convince you, that your problem is miniscule versus the power you can acquire to be happy and at peace again. Just listen to yourself when you want to start on a rampage or rattle on about your problems and tell yourself, ‘nobody is really listening or want to help, because they have their problems’, I need to find the right solution for myself and start your daily practices, google, read up about transformation and start your new journey, because it’s that simple…